Former Labour MP and justice minister Kiritapu Allan has spoken out for the first time since her sudden and highly public resignation.
In an emotional and candid Instagram post, Allan reflected on her complex journey, her mental health diagnosis, and her outlook for the future.
Allan revealed she had been through “all the stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and now acceptance.” from her vantage point atop her maunga, Mauao.
The public acknowledgement marked her first statement since she stepped down following her arrest for careless use of a motor vehicle and refusing to accompany a police officer.
Allan’s decline came as a shock to many who saw her as a rising star within the Labour Party and a beacon of hope for Māori representation in New Zealand politics.
The former justice minister had notably managed a tsunami alert on the day she was diagnosed with aggressive cancer - a feat that seemed to secure her legacy as a leader.
“All I know is that I was deeply unhappy for a long while (for tonnes of reasons),” Allan said.
“I was struggling for a long time, and while I tried to change things up, this year from the start to the end, just felt like a rolling maul of yuck.”
New diagnoses, new perspective
Allan had been charged with announcing Labour’s controversial law and order reforms, and had faced accusations of bullying from some staff members.
In her post, Allan disclosed a recent diagnosis of ADHD, PTSD and dysregulated emotions, stating it was “a new journey of learning a complete different way of operating”.
She expressed gratitude towards those who had supported her in the past and more recently.
Notable among them was former prime minister Jacinda Ardern, for her leadership and opportunities; her best mate Natalie, for raising their child while Allan served in Parliament; and broadcaster Māni Dunlop, who had been her “ride or die” through the ups and downs, including her cancer battle.
In the wake of her resignation and the broader challenges she’s faced, Allan hints at her next steps, stating she will be “advocating for causes I care about, a focus on economic growth and development, and connecting people”.
“I’ve had a lot of time to work through some deep shiz, man!” Allan said.